Who put the baby's butt in butter and then covered it in carrot cake crumbs??

Michaela: no accidents
Maeve: 2
Alasdair: 2 or 3, i can't remember due to mental trauma

Seriously, the title of this post doesn't even do this diaper justice, but it's the best I could come up with to explain this sucker.

First I smelled it, naturally. Then I saw the huge wet spot running down his pant leg in the back. So, like a good mom, I pinned him to the floor to change him. But when I opened that sucker, GEEZ. Obviously it was mostly liquid, hence the spot on his pants and the diaper itself was just soaked with some icky green liquid. But what was caught on the fibrous part the diaper was like little crumbly pieces of cake. And they were all over his butt, his "stuff", his legs, gross. And it wouldn't come off no matter how hard I tried. It took like 10 wipes, and I'm not exaggerating. I got him mostly clean, but there was this little pile of poop crumbs left on the floor under his butt. Ugh. I seriously had to get out the vacuum to clean them up. I swear, in all the diapers I have changed in my life I've never had to involve the vacuum cleaner.

Anyway, grossest poop EVAR. Now I've got to watch him closely because runny green poops are not an HD mom's friend. Everytime we get these I have to decide if it's just a stomach bug or the big "enterocolitis" scare that I've been waiting for for the last 19 months. Knock on wood it's just a bug.

And today I did some research on the interweb about cow's milk vs soy milk and constipation. Turns out there have been studies that have shown cow's milk to be constipating. So I think i'm going to try it out on Michaela. My kids all love milk. A lot. So maybe that will help her gut keep working properly.

Now, I have to go scrub the nasty poop diaper out of my head with some ice cream.