Strike 2

Michaela: no accidents
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 1

I called the ETC today and found out that they don't take our insurance. Dammit. So, I guess that's strike 2. I'm not sure we're out at strike 3, but I'd sure like to not find out. I think next I'm going to talk again to our pediatrician and see if it's worth finding a GI who might be able to help us. But for now, we're going to give the mineral oil and milk of magnesia another try and see if we can really just clean her out completely. Then maybe the Miralax might work better as a maintenance step and not as a disimpaction tool.

Nothing new to report

Michaela: no accidents
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 1

Michaela hasn't had any accidents lately, at least since the bathtub incident. Except once she peed her pants. I'm at my wits end with this girl. I wish I had more patience for her. Tomorrow I'm calling to make her appointment at the ETC.

The holidays have been fairly uneventful in the dirty diaper department. Maeve still shows absolutely NO interest in using the toilet. Doodie is perfectly healthy and we've stayed rash free now for a while. I do think, though, that my kids are somehow required to poop in every store we enter, preferably when we have a cart full of merchandise and we are at the farthest point possible from the restrooms. Amazing.

Honest, I swear.

Michaela: 1
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 1

So, I've obviously neglected my blog for a few days, but give me a break. It's Christmas!! And there's like a foot and a half of snow outside in SEATTLE if you can believe it!! I've never seen this much snow in the greater Seattle area in all my 32 years here. It's amazing!

So, anyway, I'm sure I'll be back to the daily recap once it's calmed down from the celebrations. I did, however, get Michaela to the doc today and got her a referral to the Encopresis Treatment Center in Edmonds. Hopefully we can work with them and try to get her soiling issues under control. The doc today said she was still impacted. I think she's been inpacted for 4 solid years, seriously. I'll make our first appointment after New Years is over. I asked our doc if I could give her some milk of magnesia to really try to get her colon clean and he said I could, and to add mineral oil to it as well. So I did. I mixed this really awful concoction of the MoM, Mineral oil and Egg nog. Gross. But she drank it all down and about 15 minutes later was in the toilet laying the hugest 1-piece poop I've seen from her in quite a while! But that was it. I was expecting a few hours of running to the bathroom, but it didn't happen. Then after dinner and a bath she vomited. I'm a little worried that instead of working with gravity the meds made it easier for things to work against it. Or she got a bug. I hope it's not the latter. I mean, it's Christmas!

Okay, we're finally doing something about it. Finally.

Michaela: 1 - she didn't quite make it to the bathroom this morning after waking up.
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 1

I called our pediatrician today and I'm taking M in on Monday morning to get a referral to the Encopresis Treatment Center. Good lord I hope they can help us. And my immediate plan is to give her some milk of magnesia tomorrow morning (assuming school is closed) so that we can maybe clean her whole system out.

M was probably in the bathroom about 6 times today and went #2 each time. Once I went in there to about 3/4 of a roll of t.p. and pooh all over the toilet. I mean everywhere. I don't even want to know what she had to do to get it where she got it. I'm glad to be in the dark on this one.

Sidump'r

Michaela: 2
Maeve: 0
Alasdair: 2

Okay, I have experienced the single most nasty moment of my life as a mother to date. The kids were in the bath tonight (we had spaghetti, so a bath is mandatory) all playing happily while I cleaned up the kitchen and living room, laying out their jammies and diapers, etc. After a while I walked by the bathroom and out of the corner of my eye I see Michaela getting on the toilet. So I look in there and see a HUGE BROWN POOP RUNNING DOWN THE SIDE OF MY BATHTUB. Oh. My. God. I totally lost it. I just should not have to do this with her at her age. So after screaming at her thoroughly to the point where SHE actually wanted to go to bed early, I went in and talked to her about it. I've decided that tomorrow I'm making an appointment with our pediatrician and asking him for a referral to the Encopresis Treatment Center in Edmonds. Even if nothing is physically wrong with her, of which I'm not convinced, the things we are doing to handle this are obviously not working. So we're going to go there to get some help.

I need a stiff drink tonight.

No accidents!!

Michaela: NO ACCIDENTS!!
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 3

Michaela made it through the day with no accidents!! Yay! I'm thinking I'm going to make her an "emergency kit" out of one of her old lunch boxes. I'm going to put some wipes in there, some panties and extra tights and a ziplock baggie. I'll ask her teacher if she could keep it on the floor by her desk so that if she thinks there might be an accident she can just grab it and go to the bathroom and then when she's done, bring it all back to the classroom. Plus, the lunch box is vinyl so it can be wiped out and sanitized easily.

Here's what I'd like for Christmas: Just ONE child out of my three than can use the bathroom consistently without help! Ahh, I can dream. :)

Birthday party massacre

Michaela: 1
Maeve: 2
Alasdair: 2

We went to my neice's birthday party this afternoon. Practically the minute we walked in the door I had to go and change Doodie's diaper. About 20 minutes later I had to go and change his AGAIN, and Maeve dropped a bomb too. Of course, with hers I decided to check and in doing so, stuck my finger right in it as I pulled her diaper out to see the view. I hate that. And then right as the girls were sitting down for the opening of the gifts, Michaela ran to the bathroom and promptly needed "wipes and a new pair of panties". So I had to go and clean that mess up. I pretty much spent the whole party in the bathroom. Fun!

Oh, and I missed posting on Friday. Here's the scoop with THAT. I go downstairs and notice that on top of my washer is a pair of Michaela's shorts that she has to wear under her uniform jumper. They are white. With a HUGE brown spot all over them. yeah. She pooped. After talking to her and my husband I got most of the scoop: Michaela pooped at school, like full on POOPED in her underwear and just didn't do anything about it. We keep a pair of clean panties in a zip lock bag in her backpack for just such occassions, but she didn't choose to use it for whatever reason. Then to top it off, my husband picked her up from school, she came home and watched a MOVIE before she decided to go to the bathroom and tell her dad that she'd had an accident.

What do I do with that? I mean, seriously. She's almost 7 years old and she pretty much needs a diaper. I am terrified of the day when her classmates notice and she get's deemed "Michaela Poopy Pants" or something equally horrid.

I think I missed a day...

Michaela: no accidents! Update: After publishing this post I noticed on my bathroom floor that there were TWO pair of soiled panties in there, just about Michaela's size I believe... I wish she'd at least tell me about them instead of leaving them on the floor. At least Alasdair didn't find them first!!

Maeve: 1

Alasdair: 1

The days are just flying by. I can't seem to keep track of anything anymore, much less poop.

So, today was an office day for me. Here's my second hand rundown:

From the sitter: Maeve had nothing, and Doodie had one small nugget.

A scene from my kitchen:

Scene: Mike is telling me the sitter's recap, then adding that since he's been home he changed a nasty one from Doodie and that Maeve dropped an asteroid.

Michaela: Maeve had an asteroid in her diaper?

Mike: Yep, she did.

Michaela: A REAL asteroid??

Mike: Yep, a real one. snicker

Michaela: Oh, so was it an asteroid that fit in her diaper?

Mike: Yep.

Michaela: It's not going to explode the house, right?

Ah, no promises, babe. I've seen what can happen in a Guthrie diaper!!

Hominy!

Michaela: no accidents!
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 4

So last night Mike made this spicy soup with pork and hominy in it, pozole? I think that's what it's called. Anyway, did you know that hominy works the same way as corn? Yep, comes out whole. :)

They struck again

Michaela: no accidents
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 2

I had to take my husband's car to get the oil changed this morning, so after the kids and I got up, ate and got dressed we headed out to the car. Coats all on, backpack full of books and crayons, 1 diaper each with the wipes in my bag we head out. I pick up Doodie and walk down the deck stairs only to realize that he totally stinks. Damn. I tell the girls to get in the car while I head back in the house to change him and wash up. Then after we've been at the car place for about 15 minutes Maeve asks me where the bathroom is. WHAT?? Okay, so weird. So I ask her if she needs to go potty and she says YES!! Ureka! So I take her in there and pull down her pants and pull up. Yeah, I jumped the gun there on my excitement. A big pooh ball fell out onto the floor. So really she was just telling me that she had already gone and wanted to be changed. Oh well. Maybe next time. :)

mini post

Michaela: no accidents
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 1

My kids have sucked the life out of me today, so I'm just posting the basics.

We woke up. I changed diapers. I hour later I changed Dude's poopy diaper so that I could pack up our stuff (we were visiting my sister this weekend) and leave for home. I got everything packed up and got Michaela convinced that we had to leave NOW, and Maeve walks by. I get a whiff, and yeah, she's dropped a bomb. So I had to run out to the car to get the diapers and wipes to change her, too. But that was all the dirty stuff for the day. The rest has just been sheer attitude and lack of sleep for us all.

Out of town poops

Michaela: no accidents!
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 2

A fairly easy day in the diaper department. We're visiting my sister in Chehalis this weekend and were out and about on the town for a few hours. And nobody had to go potty in the middle of nowhere or even had a dirty diaper until just before we were heading home. Nice! M & A must have decided amongst themselves to give me a break today. It always sucks to have to change a diaper on a lawn in public. :)

BAM!

Michaela: no accidents
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 4

I'm not sure what's up with Dude today, but he is FOUL.

And Maeve saved hers until right before lights out. I let them stay up late, put them to bed at like 8:30 and then let them read in bed until 9. As I was mopping my floor I hear Maeve yelling something at me, but I forgot to go and check on her. So at 9 I went in to turn off the lights and give kisses Maeve tells me she's poopie. Gah. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Kids have amazing timing. :)

I can't believe it's not Friday!

Michaela: no accidents
Maeve: ?
Alasdair: at least one, and it was just as the curtain was opening at Michaela's school Christmas Program.

How do they KNOW??? Luckily I only missed the 7th grade band, and they pretty much sucked, so no worries. :D

Is it Friday yet?

Good Grief!

Michaela: no accidents
Maeve: 1
Alasdair: 3

Okay, with the first two nasties of the day, one for each kid, I would have sworn that they just didn't poop at all yesterday and saved it all for me today! But apparently that's not the case. DH says that Doodie pooped like 3 times just yesterday evening! I guess I've got to give this kid more cheese. :)

Of course, those poops came at really great times of the day. Since I was out last night I was really super tired today and I hit my wall at about 1:00 today. So I attempted to lay down and close my eyes for a half hour or so to recharge, but Dude woke up early from his nap. Even so, I was able to doze in and out while he banged toys on my face and read me books and such. Then Maeve woke up at 2, just as I was about to get up and get us all ready to go and pick up Michaela from school. But I just lay there and lay there. Finally I got up with about 2 minutes left to get all our shoes and socks on, get out the door and strap the kids in the car, but WAIT! Maeve's seriously poopy and I do NOT want that in my car. So I had to change her. Then I picked up the Dude and WAIT! He's poopy too! But his wasn't so bad. So we piled in the car and went to the school. When Michaela got in the car she's all, Ew! Something stinks! Yeah, I know.

A night on the town and no poop for me!

Michaela: ??
Maeve: ??
Alasdair: ??

I saw my kids for approximately 1 hour this morning and won't see them again until we wake up tomorrow. Hopefully they didn't torture anyone with all their poo. Except maybe daddy. :D

I switched my day in the office on Friday for today so I could go to the Salon of Shame. My BFF Steph was reading in it tonight. I'll have a YouTube video posted soon! It was the 3rd anniversary and it was awesome!

Doodie put the "Toy" in "Toilet"

Michaela: no accidents!
Maeve: 1

Alasdair: 2

So, here's how I spent the last 6 days. Yes, 6 days. Last Monday our toilet stopped effectively flushing. I mean, it wasn't overflowing, but it wasn't emptying out what we put in there either. We had to plunge it just to "flush" the water down, basically forcing it past the blockage. So first we start yelling at Michaela about using way too much toilet paper. I swear she uses half a roll of Charmin every time she poops. So we spent 2 days and 3 toilet plungers trying to unclog the toilet. No dice.

So, Mike's new theory is that Michaela threw a pair of underwear down the toilet, maybe because she had an accident or something. But I didn't think so. I mean, she's only 6. Her panties aren't that big, plus they're cotton, so we'd be able to plunge those out. My theory is it's a toy. Doodie LOVES to play in the toilet, throwing things in there, spooning water out, etc. And the toilet lock we bought is a total piece of crap. Half the time he walks out of the bathroom carrying the toilet lock.

So, I run to Lowes and by a toilet auger. I get the "home toilet auger" for $7 and change. We try and try and try to snake out the toilet, and we get some shards of pink and yellow somethings that float down into the bowl, but it's still clogged. After about 30 minutes we end up breaking the auger. Yep. No toy. Clogged toilet. Broken auger.

At this point, it's Wednesday night and tomorrow is Thanksgiving. So we plan that on Friday or Saturday afternoon we'll remove the toilet and see what we can do. So, on Sunday (:D) I went down to Lowes to buy a new auger. We decided we'd try it the right way. I'm thinking we have like a rubber duckie or something in the toilet so the auger should really snag it so we can pull it out. I spend almost 30 bucks on the "Maintenance Toilet Auger" because it's bigger and hopefully we won't break it. We try and try and try, and again, nothing. So I go back to Lowes and get a wax ring. We drain and remove the toilet, shove the auger in up through the bottom of the toilet, and here's what we found:

It's a wooden carrot from our kitchenette with a ghost finger puppet jammed on top of it. We were never going to be able to auger that sucker out, nor shove it down through the pipe.

Now the toilet flushes! And now the bathroom door stays CLOSED.